Being love - 2 - Four qualities that transform the mind

(For Podcast, TBD.  For ITunes version, click here)

Today we continue a series of talks based on the book by Thich Nhat Hanh entitled, Teachings on Love.  He begins with this simple opening:

“The Buddha taught that it is possible to live twenty-four hours a day in a state of love.  Every movement, every glance, every thought, and every word can be infused with love.”

To cultivate this enduring love, Thich Nhat Hanh begins with what he calls the Four Immeasurable Minds, a teaching called the Brahma Viharas in Sanskrit, which is found in the first written collections of the Buddha’s teachings.  It a foundational teaching in Buddhism called the Four Immeasurables, it’s also called the four sublime states of being.  The Four Boundless Qualities that destroy the idea of a separate self. 

During the time of Buddha’s enlightenment, there was the beginning of a shift from a purely agrarian economic structure to some capitalism arising in small towns that had begun to spring up around areas in Northern India. One of the things that Buddha discovered that, along with the process selling and buying, also came greed, corruption, stealing, killing.   Perhaps we can imagine this very primitive culture 2500 years ago, just learning how to deal with each other in business arrangements.  Hmmmm….although the time may have been very long ago, it seems that we might still struggle with greed, corruption, stealing, killing.  Buddha identified that there seems to be a reaction in people, that often happens in good times and bad, when people feel a primitive sense of lack and poverty, have a sense of separation from one another, a desire, a craving to gain advantage over others, a need to put up defenses.  As Buddha reflected on the negative impact of these feelings, he could see that they were arising out of a sense of craving, aversion and ignorance.  This reaction caused great suffering in the world then, and it causes great suffering in the world now.

So what do we do?  Where do we begin?  Is it an impossible task to overcome these historic and monumental struggles within and around us?  What the Buddha discovered was that we can get beyond these struggles.  First, by recognizing them for what they are, then by practicing a kinder way of being and living, and lastly by embodying the Buddha Nature that is in each of us to see things more clearly, to act more compassionately and wisely. 

These four qualities are LOVING-KINDNESS, COMPASSION, SYMPATHETIC JOY and EQUANIMITY.  The Buddha taught the following to his son Rahula (from "Old path white clouds" by Thich Nhat Hahn):

"Rahula, Practice loving kindness to overcome anger. Loving kindness has the capacity to bring happiness to others without demanding anything in return. Practice compassion to overcome cruelty. Compassion has the capacity to remove the suffering of others without expecting anything in return. Practice sympathetic joy to overcome hatred. Sympathetic joy arises when one rejoices over the happiness of others and wishes others well-being and success. Practice equanimity or non-attachment to overcome prejudice. Non-attachment is the way of looking at all things openly and equally. This is because that is. Myself and others are not separate. Do not reject one thing only to chase after another. I call these the four immeasurables. Practice them and you will become a refreshing source of vitality and happiness for others."

Sympathetic Joy - I want all sentient beings to never be separated from the sublime joy, beyond delusion and illusion
Equanimity - I want all sentient being to live in equanimity, beyond preferences, which is beyond fear and hope.
As the source both of inner and external peace, 
they are fundamental to the continued survival of our species.'
His Holiness the XIV Dalai Lama

So, the practice of the Four Immeasurables calls upon each of us first to try and cultivate these four feelings and actions.  In AA, there is an excellent phrase that says “Fake it until you make”.  In these practices, sometimes we don’t initially feel very loving or joyful.  We start to say this prayer about everyone being happy and peaceful, and we don’t feel very happy or peaceful ourselves.  Just sit with that reaction.  Feel it completely, then go back to the practice of visualizing feeling loving and kind.  This practice is not to whitewash over longstanding emotions.  RATHER, it is to uproot those old habitual emotions, see them for what they are, and replace them with kinder and more productive ways of viewing the world. 

So, the practice of The Four Immeasurables begins with the prayer,

May all beings have happiness and the cause of happiness,

May all beings be free from suffering and the cause of suffering

May all beings have sympathetic joy which is free from suffering

May all beings come to rest in the great equanimity which is beyond attachment or aversion to friend, enemy or stranger.

Loving-kindness - I want all sentient beings to have happiness and feel love.

Compassion - I want all sentient beings to free from suffering.

So briefly, let’s start with a deeper definition of Loving-kindness.  There are is the kind of love that many of us have experience. That love when we see someone or something.  I want that person, I want that car, that thing.  This kind of love is more like lust and greed—it doesn’t always have anything to do with focusing on the other person’s happiness, or at least only at the point at which it intersects with your own.  Love, in this practice, is Love without attachment.  In Greek, this word represents divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, volitional, and thoughtful love.

Next, compassion is described as an unselfish emotion which gives one a sense of urgency in wanting to help others.  Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche often added that this is not idiot compassion, where we feel we must over-give of ourselves and our money, which may come from a place of our own feeling of lack or poverty or guilt.  Compassion in this sense, is first opening up the feeling that we are all interconnected, therefore all suffering together, then through this feeling of inter-connectedness, NOT shutting down to other pain, and taking appropriate action to hell alleviate their suffering, which sometimes is not action at all.

Third is Sympathetic Joy.  This is the joy we experience for others, when others gain.  Do you recall hearing that a co-worker got a raise or a new job, and perhaps, just perhaps, instead of feeling joy, you might have felt jealousy or frustration?  Cultivating sympathetic joy is a way to clearly see where we’re holding on to ourselves and our habitual clinging, and to let go, even just a little, to rejoice in the good fortune of others.

Lastly, is equanimity, and in fact, in a longer teaching on The Four Immeasurables, this quality is sometimes taught first, with the idea that when we can first clearly see our clinging, aversion and ignorance to all things and people, even to ourselves, we can at that point, begin to realize a better way of living, through non-preference, viewing all a equal.  Does this mean that we treat everything single person and thing exactly equal?  No.  Because if we are being fully present in each situation, certain situations and certain people need different reactions and responses.  BUT starting from a place equanimity, wanting everyone to experience living beyond attachment and fear, in that place of desiring the best for others, we each can choose a better experience for ourselves.

So, Love, Compassion, Joy and Equanimity practice is a way to first see more clearly how we are interacting in the world, and second to explore a new way of being, to experience deeper way of being, and third to fully embody these experience and sharing them fully with ourselves and with others.

'Compassion and love, joy and equanimity are not mere luxuries. 
As the source both of inner and external peace, 
they are fundamental to the continued survival of our species.'
His Holiness the XIV Dalai Lama

Being Love - 1 - Turning hate into love

(For Podcast, TBD.  For ITunes version, click here)

Today we start a series of talks based on the book by Thich Nhat Hanh entitled, Teachings on Love.  We each have within us an innate, unlimited reservoir of love that can be cultivated and radiated out, that can transform our life and the lives of those around us, without expectation from others in return.  I’m struggling this morning to put into context another terrorist bombing attack—just a few hours ago—at the Mahabodhi Temple, the place where Buddha attained his enlightenment in Bodh Gaya, India.  Several people were injured and some damage done.  First reports were that nothing major was destroyed, except perhaps the further deterioration of our faith in human beings’ ability to live peacefully together.  There have been Buddhists in Burma that have been using violence against Muslims, and the initial thinking is that this is a retaliation for that violence.

Where does this violence start?  I would offer that it starts in each of our hearts. When we hate another human being or group of human beings simply for who they are or even what they have done.  What if there wasn’t one atrocity, no matter how awful, worth hating someone or somebodies for?  Does hating someone improve the situation?  Buddhism is often thought to be a philosophy of non-violence, which it most certainly is at its core, but I often tell the story of the Buddhist on the pirate ship—the Buddhist who has the capability to kill the pirate and save 200 people’s lives—and the Buddhist does so in an act of kindness to create the most good.  But does the Buddhist hate the pirate?  Do you hate those who have hurt you?  Does your hate relieve your suffering?  Does your hate create the most good?

It seems that these bombings are perhaps an excellent example forcing us to look inside ourselves, examining what we are doing to transform ourselves and the world.  In his book, Thich Nhat Hanh describes what happened to Buddha under the Bodhi tree as the realization that each of us has the capacity to love, to accept, to understand and to transform.  It is up to us to decide what we do with whatever is given to us.  We sometimes do not get a choice.  I think about the two monks that were hurt during the blasts. What will they do with this destruction and pain thrust upon them? What have you done with whatever destruction and pain has been thrust upon you? 

Can we find a way to transform whatever is received into love, acceptance, understanding?  AND, acceptance doesn’t mean being a doormat.  There is a wrathful aspect that is taught in Buddhism, like the martial arts.  Using defenses with laser-like precision can also be an act of love, understanding and transformation.  So, what is hate?  I was going to start this morning talking about how we can generate more love, but I realized that first we must also deal with the hate that is being created, within us and around us.  What is its source?  How to do we transform hate? Starting from a place of love is much easier than starting from exactly where we are—which might be a mixture of hate and love.  I am reflecting on what arises within me, when I hear of the violence in the world.

I guess this first lesson is that wherever we go with the exploration of love, we must each first begin with ourselves.  How am I responding to the world around me?  What am I thinking, saying, doing that is relieving suffering or creating good?  How can I transform ANY hate within me into love, and create a love that is so powerful that it dissolves the hate not only in myself, but perhaps in others as well.

Lama Surya Das posted a comment on Facebook this week about what he calls “radical non-violence”, and mentions Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela and Aung Sung Suu Kyi as examples of the power of peaceful transformation.  Now, there were many dissenting opinions about whether these four people had been “pure” enough in their practice of radical non-violence, even a question about whether radical non-violence was really the way to go.  Some say that Aung Sung Suu Kyi, a leading Buddhist in Burma, has not spoken loudly ENOUGH against the violence of Buddhists against Muslims in her country.

I work hard to keep the Temple Buddhist Center politics-free, so I leave that discussion for another time and another place, but what we can work on today is our own response to whatever suffering we created or is created around us.  How do you respond?  How do you transform that which is causing suffering, to you or to others?  What shall we think? What shall we say? What shall we do? 

This series of talks will be about the power of loving-kindness to transform  ourselves and the world around us.  As we can see from the events of this day, simply generating loving-kindness may not be as easy of a solution as we might want to think.  There are complex, challenging issues today, just as there were in the Buddha’s time as well, and if we are to be a beneficial presence in this world, we cannot simply ignore what is happening all around us, and we can definitely no ignore what is happening within us.  What shall we think?  What shall we say?  What shall we do?  How can our our thoughts, our words and our actions make a positive difference in the world?

How can we transform any hate in our hearts into this powerful energy of love and compassion?  This is the task I ask each of you to reflect upon and decide if you want to explore this issue with me, but not only just think about it, but also do something about it, with your words and your actions.  I challenge us all to be the change we want to see.  This will be our topic for the next few weeks.  Alone we can do a little good, together we can change the world. 

Living Beautifully – 7 – Breaking Free

(For Podcast, TBD.  For ITunes version, click here)

We are continuing a series of talks on the book, Living Beautifully, with Uncertainty and Grace. 

“The most fundamental aggression to ourselves, the most fundamental harm we can do to ourselves, is to remain ignorant by not having the courage and the respect to look at ourselves honestly and gently.” 

--- Pema Chodron

Today, we continue, in Chapter 9, to plumb the depths of understanding  of the third commitment, the samaya vow, which is simply committing to staying with whatever arises,  not looking for the safe way out, not always choosing the easy option, the old way of coping.  It might at first feel like the worst possible of choices, but then we can begin to realize that this groundlessness can be our place of peace and calm, the uncertainty can become our reminder to stay curious and open. 

The Third Vow is called the Samaya Vow, which is described as accepting the world just where it is—it doesn’t mean we don’t take action, but it does mean that we respond from a place of being fully present in the moment.  Samaya is the Tibetan word for binding vow or sacred vow. 

It struck me that this direct seeing is what the Samaya Vow is all about—it is a commitment to not look away from those things that scare us.   We practice getting comfortable with a racing heart and sweaty palms, and ruminating thoughts. 

Pema Chodron’s teacher, Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche, was asked what is enlightenment?  He simplied said “it is to experience the sound of the bugle or the smell of tobacco, as if for the very first time.”

This powerful process of staying present enables us to use whatever arises as a tool for awakening.  He went on to say, “it’s like oatmeal.”  You may love it or hate it, so you feel strongly about getting your share or avoiding it all together, but imagine the possibility of experiencing oatmeal as just oatmeal—as if for the first time.  That oatmeal could be an opportunity for enlightenment!

The two books I’m reviewing, Pema’s and Eckhart Tolle’s A New Earth, have converged on this single point.  We are NOT our ego.  I encourage you to see the possible truth in this statement:  “I am not my thoughts; I am not my emotions; I am not my sensations.  I am beyond all that. I am in the stillness that arises when consciousness slows down.”

This third commitment is also about being kind with ourselves and practicing as best we can in each moment.  It’s about being so fully present that you will hear and see and know what needs to be known, so that you can respond in the most skillful way, so that the future will take care of itself.  We practice not being so sure about our opinions, not so sure about our perception of ourselves or of the world.  We practice not believing everything we think! We practice having a sense of curiosity about whatever it is that arises.  Pema Chodron even emphasizes that we lean into it, like a scientist exploring the details of their experiment without a hypothesis, without a pre-formed conclusion….hmmmm….what is this?

And lastly, we make friends with whatever arises.  We see ourselves in all our glory and our not-so-glory, and practice a sense of caring and calm that embraces the reality of the moment, in order to response in the most skillful way. 

Zen master Dogen said, “To know the self is to forget the self.  To forget the self is to be enlightened by all things.”

So, let’s just imagine that we can take this samaya vow and practice seeing all things and all people and all circumstances, all thoughts and all emotions and feelings as opportunities for enlightenment.  This is not to say that we must put ourselves in harm’s way to practice enlightenment.  What is being said is that we can use whatever arises as a tool for awakening.  We can practice little by little, opening up a bit more each day or each week or each month or each year—whatever pace seems right for you.   

We work with our mind as best we can, and then take action with the goal of looking for the good in each and every person we encounter.

Today, we will practice the silent chant of Ham-So, going beyond our thoughts, emotions and sensations, to find the stillness.