Drive All Blames Into One

I’m continuing the series of talks about the Lojong or Mind Training teachings.  This group of 59 pithy slogans is a great place to start a mindfulness practice or to deepen your current practice, wherever you are at.  In fact, a good reference book is Pema Chodron’s entitled, Start Where You Are.  This week, we’ll talk about two of the slogans in the Third Point:

POINT THREE: Transform Bad Circumstances into the Way of Enlightenment.

11. When the world is filled with evil, transform all mishaps into the path of enlightenment.

12. Drive all blames into one.

Evil?  Is there evil in the world?  Many people think there is, but in these teachings, we are encouraged to look more deeply into this need to label certain things and certain people as “evil”.  No doubt, there are horrendous things that happen in the world, many caused by human beings.  Are some people evil and others not? Do we all have evil inside of us, and some of us just cover it up better than others?  What is evil? 

B. Alan Wallace, one of the preeminent Buddhist translators of our time, sees this word differently.   Instead of “evil”, he describes it as “the fact that the world is enslaved in vices”.  We are enslaved to our addiction to unskillful thoughts and actions.  It is not that our essence is evil or that there is evil lurking somewhere in our minds or our bodies.  Each of us, we have the potential for both skillful and unskillful thoughts and actions, but that does not make us any less of a human being, according to Buddhist philosophy.

So, why do we feel this need to label people or things “evil”?  It seems that if something or someone is labeled as evil, then any actions that we take against them must be okay, right?  It’s “us versus them”! We create that sense of separation between ourselves and others, and that makes retaliation, resentment, revenge seem okay.

In the Buddhist teachings, there is the analogy of the two arrows.  The first arrow represents the event or circumstance or emotion or thought that causes the initial suffering.  We all can bring to mind things or people that have hurt us.  Someone said hurtful words or did hurtful things to us.  We or our loved ones have gotten sick, been in accidents, or been harmed in some way.  These are all examples of the first arrow.  These are all a part of life that will never go away.

The second arrow is our reaction to the initial suffering.  There is no denying that hurtful things will happen.  However, our reaction to the suffering, the second arrow, is always within our control.  Here’s one of the best examples from my perspective:

(facts from Wikipedia) On October 2, 2006, a man named Charles Roberts parked his truck in front of an Amish schoolhouse and entered the school, shortly after the children had returned from recess.  Roberts was holding a 9mm handgun.  He ordered the girls to line up against the chalkboard and allowed a pregnant woman, three parents with infants, and all remaining boys to exit the building.  Someone outside the building had heard the ruckus and called 911.  The first trooper arrived and, while waiting for reinforcements, attempted to communicate with Roberts.  Quickly, a large crowd—including police officers, emergency medical technicians, and residents of the Amish village—had assembled as he continued to threaten violence against the children.  The police attempted to negotiate with Roberts.  Within 45 minutes of entering the school, Roberts began shooting the victims and eventually shot ten girls (aged 6–13), killing five.

The troopers immediately approached. As the first trooper in line reached a window, the shooting immediately stopped. Roberts had committed suicide.  Inside the school, the coroner reported, "there was not one desk, not one chair, in the whole schoolroom that was not splattered with either blood or glass. There were bullet holes everywhere, everywhere."

 How did the Amish respond to this horrific first arrow?

On the day of the shooting, a grandfather of one of the murdered Amish girls was heard warning some young relatives not to hate the killer, saying, "We must not think evil of this man." Another Amish father noted, "He had a mother and a wife and a soul, and now he's standing before a just God."

A Roberts family spokesman said an Amish neighbor comforted the Roberts family hours after the shooting and extended forgiveness to them.   Amish community members visited and comforted Roberts' widow, parents, and parents-in-law. One Amish man held Roberts' sobbing father in his arms, reportedly for as long as an hour, to comfort him.   The Amish have also set up a charitable fund for the family of the shooter.  About 30 members of the Amish community attended Roberts' funeral, and Marie Roberts, the widow of the killer, was one of the few outsiders invited to the funeral of one of the victims.

 Marie Roberts wrote an open letter to her Amish neighbors thanking them for their forgiveness, grace, and mercy. She wrote, "Your love for our family has helped to provide the healing we so desperately need. Gifts you've given have touched our hearts in a way no words can describe. Your compassion has reached beyond our family, beyond our community, and is changing our world, and for this we sincerely thank you."

Some commentators criticized the swift and complete forgiveness with which the Amish responded, arguing that forgiveness is inappropriate when no remorse has been expressed, and that such an attitude runs the risk of denying the existence of evil.  Thankfully, others were supportive.  Donald Kraybill and two other scholars of Amish life noted that "letting go of grudges" is a deeply rooted value in Amish culture. They explained that the Amish willingness to forgo vengeance does not undo the tragedy or pardon the wrong, but rather constitutes a first step toward a future that is more hopeful.

So here we are, each of us, with our own struggles and suffering.  Does this mean that if someone beats us, we should hug them and say “give me more”?  Does this mean regardless of the first arrow, we do nothing?  No. By seeing the truth in the moment, we are able to more skillfully respond to the first arrow, in whatever way is the most helpful to all concerned.  The example of the Amish is clear.  They took action to try and stop the suffering in the initial encounter.  When that failed, then they took action to stop the secondary suffering that occurred.  BE AWARE OF SECOND ARROWS.

When bad things happen to us, how many arrows do we shoot into the situation?   Who are we blaming for our suffering?   What value does blaming serve?  In the slogan, “drive all blames into one”, the one is not about blaming ourselves instead of others.  Instead, when we feel a strong need to blame, it’s a signal for us to look deeper.  What are we holding on to?  Where are we stuck?  The “one” that is referred to is recognizing that all blame is centered in a belief of separation, a “them versus us” mentality.  We can try to understand the causes of suffering, but blaming ourselves or others is not helpful. 

Here is the power of this slogan.  When we feel a need to blame someone, even ourselves, we can use that emotion or thought as a wake up call.  First, “What does blame feel like?”  Then, “Why am I wanting to blame myself or someone else?” Lastly, “What is the best response in this situation?” 

Thus, the third point of the Lojong teachings is reminding us that we can use adversity as fuel for our awakening.  Bad circumstances can help us see where we are still stuck.  If our priority in life is always to seek pleasure, avoid pain and ignore everything else, then we will continue to cause ourselves more suffering.  BUT, if our priority in life is simply to fully awaken, to see clearly, then adversity becomes just another opportunity to practice.  The wonderful paradox is that happiness, peace, joy and wisdom, are by-products of waking up. 

The importance of mindfulness practice

Each time we practice being present in the moment, we hone our skills to see the truth.  With presence, first we recognize that the second arrow just causes more suffering, and we become willing to remove it.    With more practice, we are able to catch the second arrow before it is flung.  The first arrows will inevitably come, BUT we always have an opportunity whether to inflict a second, a third, a fourth.    Be mindful of your arrows.  Drive all blames into one.

Outline of Lojong teachings

How to use our struggles to transform the mind

ONE: The preliminaries, which are the basis for dharma (Truth principles) practice

1. First, train in the preliminaries: Shamatha-Vipassana meditation plus the four reminders: A. recognize the preciousness of human life, B. Wake up from the illusion that everything is permanent, C. Be aware that everything we do has consequences, D . Realize that obsessing about getting what we want and avoiding what we don’t want does not result in happiness.

TWO: The main practice, which is training in bodhicitta (awakened/open heart/mind).

Absolute Bodhicitta:

2. Regard all dharmas as dreams.

3. Examine the nature of unborn awareness.

4. Self-liberate even the antidote.

5. Rest in the nature of alaya, the essence (all the potential in the universe, our true home).

6. In postmeditation, be a child of illusion.

Relative Bodhicitta:

7. Sending and taking should be practiced alternately. These two should ride the breath.

8. Three objects, three poisons, three roots of virtue.

9. In all activities, train with slogans.

10. Begin the sequence of sending and taking with yourself. (practice of Tonglen)

THREE: Transformation of Bad Circumstances into the Way of Enlightenment

11. When the world is filled with evil, transform all mishaps into the path of enlightenment.

12. Drive all blames into one.

13. Be grateful to everyone.

14. Seeing confusion as the four kayas (modes of being) is unsurpassable shunyata (emptiness) protection.

15. Four practices are the best of methods.

16. Whatever you meet unexpectedly, join with meditation.

FOUR: Showing the Utilization of Practice in One's Whole Life

17. Practice the five strengths, the condensed heart instructions.

18. The mahayana instruction for ejection of consciousness at death is the five strengths: how you conduct yourself is important.

FIVE: Evaluation of Mind Training

19. All dharma agrees at one point.

20. Of the two witnesses, hold the principal one.

21. Always maintain only a joyful mind.

22. If you can practice even when distracted, you are well trained.

SIX: Disciplines of Mind Training

23. Always abide by the three basic principles.

24. Change your attitude, but remain natural.

25. Don't talk about injured limbs.

26. Don't ponder others.

27. Work with the greatest defilements first.

28. Abandon any hope of fruition.

29. Abandon poisonous food.

30. Don't be so predictable.

31. Don't malign others.

32. Don't wait in ambush.

33. Don't bring things to a painful point.

34. Don't transfer the ox's load to the cow.

35. Don't try to be the fastest.

36. Don't act with a twist.

37. Don't make gods into demons.

38. Don't seek others' pain as the limbs of your own happiness.

SEVEN: Guidelines of Mind Training

39. All activities should be done with one intention.

40. Correct all wrongs with one intention.

41. Two activities: one at the beginning, one at the end.

42. Whichever of the two occurs, be patient.

43. Observe these two, even at the risk of your life.

44. Train in the three difficulties.

45. Take on the three principal causes.

46. Pay heed that the three never wane.

47. Keep the three inseparable.

48. Train without bias in all areas. It is crucial always to do this pervasively and wholeheartedly.

49. Always meditate on whatever provokes resentment.

50. Don't be swayed by external circumstances.

51. This time, practice the main points.

52. Don't misinterpret.

53. Don't vacillate.

54. Train wholeheartedly.

55. Liberate yourself by examining and analyzing.

56. Don't wallow in self-pity.

57. Don't be jealous.

58. Don't be frivolous.

59. Don't expect applause.

Lojong (Mind Training) teachings

The Lojong teachings encourage us to transform our struggles in life to the fuel for awakening. Therefore, this group of teachings is very pithy, practical and a great place to start. If you’d like to follow along, there are many books to choose from, but Pema Chodron’s is one of my favorites. And it’s title, Start Where you Are, seems like the perfect New Year’s book!

When we think about starting fresh, how do we do that? These teachings by describing the two basic types of meditation: Shamatha and Vipassana. Shamatha is the type of meditation we start with on Sunday mornings, which is translated as calm abiding. We are just resting in awareness of things left just as they are, aware when we become distracted and bringing the mind back to the point of awareness. It prepares the mind for Vipassana.

Vipassana is often translated as seeing things as they are, no added stuff. But more deeply, it’s translated as insight meditation, seeing clearly into the nature of all things. Not just calmly resting in awareness but taking awareness to a deeper, broader, more profound level. As if we could see down to the levels of electrons and protons and neutrons, but even more minute, beyond even the tiniest "pieces" of being, and at the same time, more expansively, seeing all things at once in the very broadest sense. The practice of Vipassana is cultivating insight into the truest meaning of all things.

The other set of “preliminaries” that is an important starting place are the Four Mind Changers, or the Four Reflections--four thoughts that motivate the mind toward practicing and studying these Truth Principles.

The first reflection encourages us to contemplate the preciousness of our human birth. A well-known Buddhist meditation is the simple phrase: Since death is certain and the time of death uncertain, what should I do? Living can, at times, be taken for granted. Imagine all the activities and events that had to take place or not take place for you to be here reading this, in this very moment. Human beings are somewhat fragile, and being born ain’t easy. We each have had our own challenges, the issues in our lives that we grappled with. We all navigated through all the dangers and pitfalls of our lives to arrive at this moment right now. So, to experience the manifestation of spirit is quite miraculous. We don’t know what tomorrow may bring. We don’t know for sure what will happen later today. But by contemplating this fact, we can pour ourselves wholeheartedly into this moment. This is another paradox in Buddhism. To live life fully, we must recognize how easy it is to not live. This first reflection is telling us to not take so much for granted, to wake up with gratitude to this experience of life in all its complexity.

The second mind-changer or reflection is challenging us to wake up from this dreamlike state of pretending that anything is permanent. As most of us experience, western culture is often about accumulating things, accumulating experiences and even accumulating people in our lives. Checking off the list of things and activities and people we need to have in our lives in order to be happy, and wanting ourselves, and those things and those people to not only be a certain way, but to also stay whatever way it is that we like them to be. We tried to control our lives so things can stay fun and cushy. But no matter how much we try, we cannot make things stay the same. Nor should we try. The things we like fade away as do the things we don't like--both the things we like and dislike can awaken us. A child once told Thich Nhat Hanh how grateful she was that things change. Otherwise, she would never grow up! So, we are asked to loosen up a bit, not try to force everything and everyone to be just the way we think we want it or them...accepting things just as they are, not out of complacency but as the best place to start living. With this mind changer, we are practicing accepting the ever-changing-ness of life. It doesn’t mean that Buddhists don’t do anything productive. It means we first see with fresh eyes what is happening right now. Instead of acting out of habit, we can imagine that we don’t know and must look again. And from this place of just seeing, just being, we find all new ways of being and doing.

We can try seeing things and actions and people with fresh eyes, adding compassion and wisdom to each situation instead of a checklist for improvement. This is critically important to the way we view our own bodies our own lives. Many of us are constantly trying to get things just right. Get a new haircut, find the perfect dress. Instead, this reflection is encouraging us to waking up each morning and first focus on full awareness, instead of first on the to-do list. This idea seems like the polar opposite of what we have been taught to do, but it’s been proven to work a heck of a lot better than the method of looking for external happiness. Our lives are like sand mandalas--everything we have will eventually wash away. We may wish for certain things in our lives to change more quickly or other situations to not change at all. But the question is: How do we look at each situation with curiosity and nonjudgment? Our lives will continue to change and morph and become something entirely different, whether we want them to or not. The amount of joy in the journey is determined by whether we loosely ride the waves of uncertainty, or we grasp at everything with tight white knuckles.

The third reflection is that everything we do has consequences. In Hinduism, the belief is that karma is unrelenting; if this then that. But Buddha turned the idea of karma on its side. His teachings are that yes, there is the law of cause and effect, but it is far more complex than we can imagine. It is far more helpful to focus on what we do right now in this moment, than to worry about what we did ten years ago. This moment is the only place where we can change our lives. How can we be more kind and generous and grateful and wise right now? There is this element of grace that exists in Buddhism. The idea is that we can wake up at any moment and begin increasing the compassion and wisdom in our lives.

The four reflection is about how labeling things as good, bad or irrelevant is causing us suffering, If we don’t try something new, we will continue to get the same suffering in our lives. We focus on what we’re afraid of, what we don’t want. Instead, this reflection is encouraging us to see what is and work with it. Sometimes suffering may seem too harsh a word, but even that vague sense of dissatisfaction is robbing you of the joy just waiting to be discovered in each moment. Don’t live your life waiting for things to be different. Happiness is about what is within us, not what is happening to us. Aldous Huxley said that the measure of man is not what happens to him, but what he does with what happens to him.

So, this last reflection on curiosity and nonjudgment is to fully experience not knowing. What if it was okay to not know, but just to keep asking the question with an open heart? What if the answers that we are seeking are there in the silence of each moment? Not knowing allows us to find new answers. We can reflect on the idea of “I don’t know”.

So, the four reflections are:

· The preciousness of our human birth

· The contemplation of impermanence

· The law of motivation/intention (cause) and results (effect)

· The fact that craving, aversion and ignoring causes suffering and will never bring us complete happiness

These four reflection are powerful tools to support us in transforming our sense of living, to infuse deep happiness into life regardless of our external circumstances.

The purpose of this teaching is to see with fresh eyes, to hear with fresh ears, to taste, to smell, to feel the warmth of the breeze on our skin, as if for the first time. This week, imagine that you are experiencing some activity for the very first time. Imagine that you truly don’t know. And see how that changes the experience.