The Practice of Serving Others

On Memorial Day weekend, we can take a moment to have gratitude for those who have served us and to remember the value of serving others. Integral to the Buddhist teachings is waking up to the fact that we are not separate beings. Often, it probably seems like we are going through life negotiating for our piece of the pie, but the Buddha taught that is just an illusion. The Truth of being is that we are intimately interconnected, in fact no separate self exists. For us westerners, that can seem like a crazy idea, us with our individualism and our proclamation that we need to be free to be happy. In Buddhism, this simple notion gets turned on its head. Yes, we need freedom to be happy, but it’s not found in staking out our territory more definitively. Freedom in the Buddhist teachings, is about freedom from this fixed notion of being separate from others. Freedom is about being free from our need to feel separate. Freedom is recognizing our interconnection and rejoicing in that.

So, on this special holiday for remembering those who have served us, we can take this weekend to reflect on what it means to serve others. In Mahayana Buddhism, serving others is seen as so important that each of us would give up total and eternal bliss in order to stay present with others and help them become enlightened as well. Would you be willing to give up total bliss to serve others? In our little minds, we often find pleasure at the the expense of others. We feed our egos, we act impulsively, we harm others through our hurtful words or actions. The first step on this enlightened journey is to wake up to this harm we are causing others and commit our intention to do no harm. We can all be the caretakers of our life and the lives of others by being more skillful in our words and actions towards others and towards ourselves. With this passionate intention to serve others, we can be more forgiving and more grateful for the words and actions of others towards us. Once we start to feel the freedom that arises from forgiveness and gratitude, a space is created in our lives for more forgiveness and gratitude to unfold.

With more attention and intention given to a desire to serve others, we start to loosen our grip on the needs of our own ego. In serving others, it becomes less important to obsess about our own concerns and worries. Imagine letting go, even a little, of the continuous soundtrack in our head of what we need to be happy, what we must do, what we must have, what others must do for us, in order for us to be happy. In this moment, we can begin to imagine a life of service, spending more time thinking about how we can be of service to the world, and less time thinking about what we need the world to give us. In Buddhism, we are taught that we already have everything we need to be happy. Abraham Lincoln said, “People are as happy as they make up their minds to be.” So, we can start here, start now. This is NOT about being a doormat and being a slave to others. This is about rising above the little inconsequential day-to-day things we usually focus on, and inspire ourselves to think of how we can embody higher levels of service.

In How to Practice: The Way to a Meaningful Life by the Dalai Lama, translated and edited by Jeffrey Hopkins, he points out that, Buddhism, there are two basic types of practices: Sutra (which is about studying and practicing the teachings of other enlightened beings) and Tantra (which is the practice of imagining ourselves as enlightened beings) . For example, in Tantra, we use the power of imagination in a practice called deity yoga. The Dalai Lama describes it in this way. “Imagine:

1. Replacing your mind as it ordinarily appears, full of troubling emotions, with a mind of pure wisdom motivated by compassion

2. Substituting your body as it ordinarily appears (composed of flesh, blood, and bone) with a body fashioned from compassionately motivated wisdom

3. Developing a sense of a pure self that depends on purely appearing mind and body in an ideal environment, fully engaged in helping others. This distinctive practice of Tantra calls for visualizing yourself with a Buddha's body, activities, resources, and surroundings, it is called ‘taking imagination as the spiritual path.’”

At first it might seem uncomfortable. Who am I to imagine being Buddha? Imagine being Jesus? Isn’t it a lie to imagine having qualities that I don’t yet have? Enlightened teachers have answered these questions for us. You inherently are the Buddha—inherently awakened. These practices open us up to the true reality to our beings. At first, it might seem like you’re just making stuff up with imagination. Think of it instead that you are uncovering who you truly are. We all have the potential for great goodness. This visualization practice just uncovers that which is already there.

The Dalai Lama encourages us to purposely imagine ourselves as having a divine body, a divine mind. This is an imagination meditation; you need not be thoroughly convinced from the depths that you actually have pure mind, body, and selfhood. Rather, based in clear imagination of ideal body and mind, you are cultivating the sense of being a deity, compassionately helping others...to engage in Tantra at any level demands a powerful intention to become enlightened for the sake of others.

So, on this Memorial Day, we can take these precious moments to reflect on the wonderful things that others have done for us, and recommit ourselves to being of service to others. Through the power of our imagination, we can awaken to our true being and serve others from that place of selflessness. On this day, we can focus on forgiveness and gratitude, for others and for ourselves. We can have joy for our interconnectedness, joy in the fact that we are not separate. That is what this whole journey is about.

The Problem as Antidote by Janet Taylor

I’ve been reading Joyful Wisdom by Yongey Mingyur Rinpoche, who is the son of the great Tibetan teacher, Tulku Urgyen Rinpoche. Mingyur writes very clearly that meditation is about using our minds to end the suffering that our minds are causing us. Within in the problem is the antidote. When people first get interested in meditation, they are often motivated by getting rid of stress, learning to relax, or even making a deeper spiritual connection. Yet, when we first start meditating, it can be a very challenging experience. When first taught to be aware of our thoughts, it may sometimes seem that the thoughts multiply and even speed up, sometimes they seem to build in their tenacity to smother us. We’ve been thinking all this crazy stuff all along, and now it’s worse because we’re so painfully aware of this crazy stuff. So, a critical element of learning to meditate is recognizing that within the very problem, this runaway mind of ours, is the antidote to the suffering caused by the mind. It is about learning to rest with, make friends with, our thoughts. In meditation, we are neither trying to run away from, nor are we trying to run towards our thoughts and emotions. In meditation we are practicing not running anywhere. Just sitting, just making friends with whatever irritating thought we might be having at any moment. And not getting too attached to any thought we deem pleasant either. Just being with all our thoughts in a non-judgmental way.

This awareness with non-judgment is the antidote to our suffering, but I appreciate that is a very challenging task. The Buddhist story that goes along with this teaching is the monk who goes into the cave to meditate and is visited by hungry ghosts, which represent his crazy thoughts. First, he tries to run away from them, but they follow him unceasingly. Then, he become obsessed with them, and the fear inside him grows, which causes the hungry ghosts to grow as well. Finally, he decides to sit down and serve them tea and make friends with them, and then they go away. Such is the practice with our own thoughts.

We can just keep sitting with our thoughts, trying our best not to be afraid of them AND trying not to latch onto to any passing happiness that does arise. Isn't it true? Feelings of happiness can be very seductive. Yes, we are learning to meditate to end our suffering and have lasting happiness, but when happiness spontanesously arises, we are instructed to just sit with that as well. Ever been having a really great time and started wishing that it would never end, that it would just go on and on forever. Then, when the “great time” is over, the holding on to it diminishes the experience of it.

Or when we feel depressed, and recognizing that feeling causes our thoughts to go into overdrive of fear that this bad feeling will last forever. As long as random thoughts are driving our happiness, we will never be happy, at least not for very long.

So, with meditation, we recognize the power of our minds to directly impact our experience of life. Through meditation, we are training that power for good, for sense of deep happiness and deep peace, unentangled from whatever is happening externally.

Think for a moment—what was it that got you interested in meditation? Was it running from something or running towards something? Right now, get that sense of what your initial motivation might have been. Now imagine that you stop running, you stand still, your thoughts still might be racing ahead or behind you or all around, but you just stop chasing them and stop being chased. Imagine sitting down in the middle of all the thoughts you have and making friends.

Our thoughts are not the enemy, our thoughts are just thoughts--fleeting, ephemeral, electrical impulses. If you were to look into your brain, you can see the energy created by thoughts but not the thoughts themselves. These ideas that we can get so hung up on, are only as real as we decide them to be.

Mingyur Rinpoche has terrible anxiety attacks as young monk, and used the power of meditation to just sit with these wild thoughts that he would have. Just sitting, not making up a story, just being with our thoughts can have a deeply transformative impact on how we experience life.

There’s a wonderful book that's available for free on the Internet by Lama Yeshe entitled, Make Your Mind an Ocean. In it, Lama Yeshe describes this incredible happiness that comes from a mind not tied down to its random thoughts. The Mind as an Ocean ebbs and flows with each moment. Imagine your own thoughts rising and falling away without getting stuck in any way. How peaceful that would be…

"Since everything is like an 'apparition,'
Perfect in just being 'What It Is' -- as it is.
Having nothing to do with 'good' or 'bad,'
'acceptance' or 'rejection' --
You might as well just burst out laughing!"
-- Tibetan master Longchenpa, fourteenth century Tibet

Bodhicitta and Bodhisattvas

For Mother’s Day, it seems appropriate to discuss two key concepts in Buddhism called Bodhicitta and Bodhisattva. The word Bodhicitta is a combination of the Sanskrit words meaning "awakening" or "enlightenment” and mind or consciousness. So, Bodhicitta can be translated as "awakening heart/mind" or "mind of enlightenment". For example, at the end of each Sunday service, we dedicate the merit that we have accrued to the benefit of all beings. The merit we are accruing through practicing meditation and mindfulness is the awakening of our mind, or more accurately our heart-mind, the wisdom of our being. And it’s important to note that the compassion is combined with wisdom. It’s not about just giving everything away to others and just doing whatever others want us to do. It’s about having the wisdom to know what truly is the compassionate thing to do.

In the Mahāyanā tradition, which is the school of Buddhismwhich started around the first century, it’s taught that once we awaken to our true nature, just as the Buddha did, compassion and wisdom will prompt us to help all other beings to become enlightened as well. So, Bodhicitta, the awakened heart-mind, is a key component of enlightenment.

There are even two types of bodhicitta identified:

§ Relative bodhicitta, which refers to a perspective in which we work for the good of all beings as if it were for ourselves.

§ Absolute, or ultimate, bodhicitta, which refers to the total freedom from attachments (particularly attachment to the idea of a separate, solid self) and from fixed ideas about the world and how it should be.

So, the term bodhicitta in its most complete sense would combine both:

· the arising of spontaneous and limitless compassion for all sentient beings, and

· the falling away of the attachment to the illusion of an inherently existent self. Once we let go of this attachment to being separate and solid, we recognize the innate interconnectedness of all beings.

That’s a pretty tall order! We might not make it completely in this lifetime but the idea is that we strive for getting as far as we can along the path. And it might be helpful to think of Bodhicitta like being a great mom; Being a great mom to not only your own children but being a great mom to the all beings.

Patrul Rinpoche in his book Words of My Perfect Teacher, talks about the various stages of Bodhicitta, of how we might not immediately experience Absolute Bodhicitta, but we dedicate ourselves to building up compassion and wisdom.The lowest level is the way of the King, who primarily seeks to attain enlightenment first for his own benefit but who recognizes that his well-being depends crucially on that of his kingdom and his subjects. The middle level is the path of the boatman, who ferries his passengers across the river and simultaneously, of course, ferries himself as well. The highest level is that of the shepherd, who makes sure that all his sheep arrive safely ahead of him and places their welfare above his own.

So, within this context of Bodhicitta, A Bodhisattva is anyone who, having experienced enlightenment, the experience of full awakening, who is then motivated by the great compassion that arises from that awakening, to spontaneously wish to attain Buddhahood for the benefit of all beings, and then works toward achieving that goal.

In this holistic sense of compassion and wisdom, We can think about not only feeling love for our own mothers and not only for our own children, but also how we can be a mother to ourselves and a mother to all others in our life.

I’ll end with Patrul Rinpoche’s wonderful words about taking a vow of bodhicitta, how cultivating bodhicitta is like imagining that every being was at one time our mother, at another time our child:

“Of all the countless living creatures throughout the vast reaches of the universe, there is not one who has not been my parent in the course of our succession of lives without beginning. I can be certain that, as my parents, they have all looked after me with every possible tenderness, given me the very best of their own food and clothing and nurtured me with all their love, just as my present parents have done.

My old mothers, how could I ever liberate myself alone and leave you all behind here suffering? For the sake of all beings, I shall awaken the sublime bodhicitta. Learning to emulate the mighty deeds of the Bodhisattvas of the past, I shall make whatever efforts are necessary, till there is not one being left suffering.”

The Four Mind Changers

Why meditate? While each of us may have specific answers (like reduce stress, increase focus or become more spiritual, etc.), the more general answer seems to be, "to be happier." In fact, happiness appears to be an innate human desire.

In past psychological research, it was found that people have a certain "happiness" setpoint in life, somewhere along the scale from consistently unhappy to consistently happy. The results look like a standard bell-shaped curve, with a few outliers and most people falling somewhere in the middle. When big events in life were accounted for, like winning the lottery or having a disabling accident, people's happiness levels immediately rose or fell dramatically, only to return, two to five years later, to the previous setpoint. So, this research would seem somewhat disheartening that we can't really change our level of happiness.

However, new research is showing something quite amazing, click here for a CBC news report about MRI scans on a Tibetan monk. Younge Khachab Rinpoche was hooked up to an MRI machine and shown some tragic pictures while he practice a meditation on compassion. What the researchers found was surprising. The monk showed "off the charts" levels of happiness activity in the brain (located in a specific area) regardless what was happening externally. Of course, the monk had been meditating for many thousands of hours. However, it was also determined that even individuals just learning to meditate can have an impact on their levels of happiness. The research demonstrates that we can, in fact, raise our happiness setpoint through the practices of meditation and mindfulness. Good news indeed!

In addition to the basic meditation technique of straight spine, focus on the breath and noting distractions, there are many other helpful practices to achieve this result. Another basic Buddhist practice is called The Four Mind Changers, four reflections that help us experience ourselves and our world from a different perspective.

The first reflection encourages us to contemplate the preciousness of our human birth. We all often take this for granted. Imagine all the activities and events that had to take place or not take place for each of us to be sitting here this morning. Human beings are somewhat fragile, and being born ain’t easy. Every living being has its own set of challenges. To experience the manifestation of human life is quite miraculous. So, this first reflection is telling us to not take so much for granted, to practice gratitude for life.

The second mind-changer or reflection is challenging us to wake up from this dreamlike state of pretending that we and things are permanent. Western culture is often about accumulating--things, experiences, even relationships. We want ourselves, and our things and people to be or become a certain way, then stay whatever way we like them best. We try to control our lives so things can stay fun and cushy. No matter how much we try, all things change. Even something as solid as platinum erodes over time. In this very moment, each cell of our body is going through some kind of change. Each of us is going to die one day. The Buddha wanted us to wake up to this fact. It’s so easy in this busy world to get lulled into forgetting that we don’t have eternity to wake up to the joy of living. So, we are asked to try loosening up, to ride the wave of change instead of trying to fight against it. Try taking things as they are and adding compassion and wisdom to each situation instead creating a checklist for improvement. Try listening to the innate wisdom in each ever-changing moment to know what's yours to do.

This acceptance is critically important to the way we view our lives. Many of us are constantly trying to get things just right. Get a new haircut, find the perfect dress, get the perfect job. Imagine, instead, waking up each morning and focusing on showing up fully present, with gratitude for whatever happens. This idea might seem like the polar opposite of what we have been taught to do. Our lives will continue to change and morph and become something entirely different. The amount of happiness in the journey is determined by whether we ride the waves of impermanence, or grasp at everything with tight fists.

The third reflection is that everything we do has consequences. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but somehow our actions have consequences, the law of karma. However, even less-than-skillful outcomes can be translated into new directions, new opportunities, new meaning. This reflection is not telling us to begin worrying about what we did wrong in the past. It’s about understanding that the only thing that matters going forward is our motivation and intention in each new moment. The idea of karma from a Buddhist perspective is that we can wake up at any moment and begin acting with compassion and wisdom instead of acting in unskillful ways.

The four reflection is understanding that judging everything as good, bad or irrelevant is causing us suffering

Most of us look at life through the lens of our pre-conceived notions. "This thing or person is good", "This thing or person is bad", or even "This thing or person doesn't matter to me" (i.e. "won't make me happy"). This reflection encourages us to open our eyes to new ways of seeing, increasing the amount of joyful curiosity that we bring to each moment. There is a wonderful story about a ninety-year old man who, after his wife passed away, was being moved to a nursing home since he was legally blind and could no longer care for himself alone. The woman showing him his new room begins to describe the details, like the lace on the curtains and the new bedspread. The old man replies, "Beautiful! Perfect". The woman asks how he can be so sure since he can't see. He joyfully responds that he woke up that morning deciding that the room would be beautiful and perfect, so thinking it has of course made it so. Each of us has the ability to set our intention to be happy, regardless of our external circumstance, and doing so actually makes happiness more likely. Abraham Lincoln once said, "Most folks are as happy as they make up their minds to be." Science now proves that he was right!

So, the four reflections are:

· The preciousness of our human birth

· The contemplation of impermanence

· The law of cause and effect; our motivation/intention leads to certain outcomes

· Judging by craving, aversion and ignorance causes suffering and will never bring us lasting happiness like having a joyful curiosity will.

The purpose of this teaching is simply to increase our willingness to loosen the strangehold we have on our old habits of clinging to ourselves, to things, to shutting down, closing in, to believing our projections. From this new perspective, our true being can come through, and we can discover the innate happiness within.